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FAQ
Are there differences
between cremation & a funeral?
What
do funeral directors do?
What is embalming and why do
it?
What questions do children
ask?
Creating Meaningful
Events that Celebrate Life
What is meant by "Meaningful
Events"?
What is meant by "Celebrating
Life" and how do you do it?
Cremation Services
What is cremation and how
is it done?
What types of cremation services
are available?
Who does cremation? What about
cremation societies?
Planning Ahead
Why plan and pay ahead?
How to plan and pay ahead
Many believe they must make
a choice between cremation and a funeral.
They believe cremation is a less expense
ALTERNATIVE to having a funeral. In reality,
cremation and a funeral are two different
choices.
Cremation is a choice made
regarding the way a body is prepared at
the time of death; it does not take the
place of a funeral. When thinking of cremation,
the choice is between being cremated or
being buried and either can be done in a
cost-effective manner.
A funeral is a choice made
regarding the way in which the death of
an individual is acknowledged. A funeral
can be held for both a cremation or a burial.
Funeral services can be held in a variety
of places. They can be as simple as one
or two people meeting to remember the individual,
or, as elaborate as a gathering of many
people over a period of days. If cremation
is chosen, the funeral can be held prior
to the cremation, or following it.
We can assist you in exploring
these choices - whether it is cremation
or burial, and the many options available
for funeral services.
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The primary role of a funeral
director is to help, and to serve people
after they have experienced a death.
Funeral directors help the
family plan the memorial service or funeral,
and then take responsibility for coordinating
those decisions. This includes matters such
as: securing the location for the service;
arranging for someone to officiate; ordering
the flowers and memorial folders; providing
the obituary and other information to newspapers;
filing legal documents with governmental
agencies; and, directing various aspects
of the service itself. The funeral director
is also responsible for preparing the deceased
for the services and making sure the presentation
fulfills the wishes of the family.
In all these activities,
it is the concerned, caring service to families
that is the hallmark of the funeral director.
Advisor, counselor, organizer, and caregiver
are just some of the roles which funeral
directors play in helping you through your
loss.
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Embalming is the practice
of chemically treating the body of the deceased.
This process retards the body's decay, improves
the physical appearance of the body, and
reduces the public health hazard.
Embalming is required by
law, when the person has died of a communicable
disease; if the body is transported across
state lines; or when the burial or cremation
takes place more than 72 hours after death.
If these circumstances do not apply, the
embalming is not required.
However, because the appearance
of the body is so important, most families
choose embalming if these is a public viewing
of the deceased at the visitation, memorial
service or funeral. And, for public health
reasons, many facilities have a policy that
requires embalming if a viewing of the body
is held.
Any concerns you may have
about the need for embalming can be discussed
with our staff.
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When a death occurs, children
need to be included. They will have questions
that need to be answered, and feelings that
need to be heard by an adult that cares
about them.
They may ask questions like:
"Why did Grandpa die?"
"Where did he go?"
"Was it my fault?"
"Will I die?"
"Who will take care
of me if you die?"
Try to give children simple
answers they can understand. Sometimes adults
make the mistake of saying too much, or
offering an answer to a question they haven't
been asked.
In answering children's questions,
be open with your feelings and encourage
children to express their feelings. Let
them know they can ask questions any time
they have them.
Your answers to their questions
are important, but what is more important
is the love and concern you give them. Plenty
of hugs, attention, and reassurance will
comfort children of any age, even if they
don't completely understand what has happened.
You can help children by
encouraging their questions and responding
to them with love, patience, and reassurance.
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A "Meaningful Event"
is a memorial or funeral service that touches
everyone present, with an understanding
of who the person was that died, and what
they lived for. The event brings meaning
to people by allowing them to feel how that
person touched their lives.
That person had a very special
life: they had beliefs, dreams, troubles
they dealt with, and things they loved that
brought them joy. A meaningful event shares
those things that were uniquely that person
and allows people to acknowledge and feel
that person's life.
It might be as simple as
reading a favorite poem, or playing the
person's favorite Dixieland version of "When
the Saints go Marching In," Or even
telling a joke or funny story they delighted
in. For a child, it might be reading their
favorite book, or having their most loved
toys there. All those things that had meaning
to the person who died, will give meaning
to the service.
A "Meaningful Event"
creates something that touches everyone
with the gift of that person's life.
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"Celebrating life"
means acknowledging the life of the person
who died. It means applauding their life
and rejoicing in the fact that they lived.
The person who died, had
an impact on everyone who attends the service.
They had a special gift that everyone felt.
It might have been strength, or humor, or
stubbornness. Whatever it was, it was a
quality that touched people's lives.
"Celebrating Life"
means sharing memories of the person, and
how they affected your life - the adventures
or quiet moments you shared, the ways they
inspired you, or little things they did
to make you laugh. Memories can be funny,
sad, happy, or bittersweet, but they all
tell a story about the person. It is important
to share those memories because it brings
meaning to our life, and to the life of
the person who died.
All people can create memorial
or funeral services that are meaningful
events. When planning the service, all you
need is your knowledge of the person: special
things they did, things they loved, and
shared memories. We can help you plan an
event that captures the spirit of the person,
and brings meaning to everyone who attends.
A few examples might help.
One woman, who drove her
husband everywhere during their married
life, wanted to drive the hearse to the
cemetery. This was a gesture she could make
that was meaningful to her and other people
who knew them.
A family of one woman served
cookies and donuts because every time someone
came over to the woman's house, she made
them sit down and have some with her.
Another woman, whose husband
had died, put together a picture board that
displayed photographs of him taken at different
stages in his life - from childhood to a
recent vacation they had taken. It made
people feel good to see parts of his life
that they knew and remembered.
You can "Celebrate Life"
in a memorial or funeral service by encouraging
people to share their memories of the person,
and the meaning that person had in their
lives.
We can help you create a
service that captures the special qualities
of the person, and helps bring healing to
you and others.
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A memorial service or funeral
is a gathering of family and friends who
come together to honor the memory of someone
who has died.
It is important to most of
us to commemorate the significant events
that happen throughout our lives. Baptisms,
graduations, weddings, birthdays, anniversaries,
and memorial services or funerals are all
examples of important life events that we
recognize through some form of ritual or
ceremony.
Memorial services and funerals
provide an important rite of passage. Similar
to rituals which mark other transitions
in life, memorial services and funerals
provide a time for family and friends to
acknowledge the life of the loved one, and
share their feelings concerning the loss
of this person in their lives. Coming together
like this helps people accept the death,
which is a critical part of adjusting to
the loss and like other life events, they
allow us to come together and help each
other.
Memorial services and funerals
can be as unique as the people planning
them. While they are often held at churches,
synagogues, or funeral homes, they may be
held in any location requested by the family.
Memorial services and funerals that remember
the individual in personal ways can be very
healing. We all carry memories, and it is
helpful to share these memories through
readings or music, or other kinds of participation.
Memorial services and funerals
are an important ritual in our lives. They
affirm our basic beliefs about life and
death, and help us through our loss.
If you wish to talk with
someone about memorial services or funerals,
we will help you with any questions you
may have.
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Memorial and funeral services
can be as varied as the lives of the individuals
they acknowledge. Every memorial or funeral
service can be a unique experience which
commemorates the life of a loved one or
valued friend.
While Memorial and funeral
services traditionally have been held at
churches, synagogues, or funeral facilities,
they can be held at many other locations:
parks, a friend or family member's home,
senior citizen centers, schools, or almost
any public place requested by the family.
The memorial or funeral service
can be a ceremony which acknowledges the
person and involves family and friends.
People can participate through music, reading,
speaking, or sharing stories about the individual
who has died. All the ways that the person
loved life can be brought into the memorial
or funeral service.
Probably the best answer
to the question of, "What kind of memorial
or funeral services are available?"
is to ask, "What would you like the
memorial or funeral service to be?"
We can talk with you and
help you plan a memorial or funeral service,
that expresses your needs and desires.
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The cost of a memorial or
funeral service, like other family events
such as weddings, can be selected within
a range of prices. Unlike weddings, however,
many people aren't familiar with the items
and services that are necessary for a funeral.
The costs can be put into
four categories: The items that are purchased
for the memorial or funeral service; the
professional services of the funeral director,
who handles all the details of the service;
the use of the facility or other location
and its equipment; and finally, the transportation
required for the service.
It is important to realize
that within each of these categories, there
are choices you may select based on your
wishes for the memorial or funeral service
funeral and your budget.
Funeral costs can be controlled.
The costs can be tailored to your budget,
without sacrificing your ability to create
a service that will be meaningful to you
and others.
One way to control funeral
costs is to select items in the price range
that fits your budget. Caskets, for example,
can range from several hundred dollars to
several thousand dollars. The difference
in the price depends on the material they
are constructed from. Soft woods, like pine
or poplar, are the least expensive. Prices
increase as steel, solid hardwoods, copper,
and finally Bronze are used.
Burial vaults, which are
usually required by cemeteries, are also
available in a price range similar to caskets.
Burial vaults protect the casket and prevent
the grave site from shifting or sinking.
The difference in price depends on the structural
strength of the material used to construct
the vault.
There are also options to
choose from when selecting services. A simple
service at the graveside is usually the
least expensive. Because the costs involved
with a memorial or funeral service change
over time, it is best to contact us and
discuss prices and options. We will send
you our current Price List which itemizes
many of the costs associated with memorial
and funeral services.
We can talk with you and
help you plan a service that meets your
needs and budget.
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Cremation, like burial or
entombment, is an option for how the body
is handled after a death.
With burial, the body is
placed in a casket and buried underground
at a cemetery. If a body is entombed, the
casket containing the body is placed in
a mausoleum at a cemetery. Cremation is
a process that reduces a human body to ashes.
This process is done at a facility called
a crematory. The body is brought to the
crematory in a container and placed inside
a device called a retort. When the retort
is turned on, the high temperature inside
of it reduces the body to ashes. Once the
cremation process is complete, the ashes
are removed. The ashes are then placed in
a container and returned to the family.
Often, the family chooses
to place the ashes in an urn as a memorial.
Or, if the ashes are scattered, they may
keep the urn in remembrance of the loved
one.
With cremation, it is still
possible to have services - like a visitation,
a funeral, or a memorial - that allow family
and friends to remember and acknowledge
the life of the deceased.
It is important you have
choices in how your loved one is remembered,
and cremation is one of these choices. If
you would like to have more information
or if you have any additional questions
about the process of cremation, we can answer
them.
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The types of service you
can have with a cremation are similar to
when burial is chosen. The only difference
is when you choose to have the services,
either before the cremation or after.
Many families choose to have
a visitation the night before a funeral.
At a visitation the casket may be open or
closed, depending on the wishes of the family.
The next day, a funeral service takes place
at a location chosen by the family; that
might be at a church, funeral home, park,
or another location. Then, after the funeral,
the cremation takes place.
Another option is to have
the cremation first and then have a memorial
service at a chosen location. A third option
is immediate cremation with no services
for the family or friends.
With all these options, after
the cremation, the ashes of the deceased
are returned to the family. The ashes may
be buried, scattered at a special area or
placed in a memorial urn.
We can help you explore these
options to create something meaningful for
you and your family.
Cremation is an option offered
by most funeral homes. While many people
believe cremation is available only at a
cremation society or crematory, this is
not true.
A cremation society is simply
a business that performs cremations for
people. They may offer a membership, which
entitles you to a small discount on their
price for a cremation.
Funeral homes and crematories
both offer cremations. We can handle the
cremation and help you design memorial services
that are most meaningful to you. We have
had many years of experience working with
families who choose cremation. So, if you
would like to discuss cremation, or any
other options, talk to us and ask for current
prices and services. Remember, a cremation
society is not your only choice.
We can answer any questions
you may have concerning cremation, and talk
with you about other services they have
to offer.
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Planning a memorial or funeral
service within hours of a death can be a
very difficult experience. There are many
details to attend to, and critical decisions
must be made, at a time when people are
least able to make them. Planning a memorial
or funeral service ahead of time, removes
much of the burden from your family.
When you plan your memorial
or funeral service in advance, or that of
another family member, you have an opportunity
to involve other family members and discuss
your wishes with them. And, it allows you
and your family the time to arrange for
special and unique ways to acknowledge your
life, or the life of a family member. Once
the plans are made, this information can
be put on file with us.
When planning ahead it is
also important to decide if you should set
aside money to pay for the memorial or funeral
service. There are three primary benefits
for paying a memorial or funeral service
ahead of time.
First, there is the peace
of mind you get, in knowing your children,
or other family members will not be financially
burdened with the expense of the memorial
or funeral service.
Second, by choosing a facility
that guarantees the memorial or funeral
service, you have the assurance that the
services you select today, will be provided
in the future at no additional cost.
And the final benefit to
paying ahead for a memorial or funeral service,
is you are able to protect the money from
being used for other things - things that
may not be as important to you. Also, by
making the funding irrevocable, the money
can be safeguarded from the costs of a long-term
illness.
Not all facilities offer
a guaranteed funeral plan, even when you
pay ahead. All Cunningham facilities offer
a service guarantee.
Knowing everything is taken
care of will give both you and your family,
peace of mind.
If you would like to discuss
planning a memorial or funeral service,
or if you would like more information, call
and set up an appointment at Cunningham.
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Memorial or funeral services
may be planned in advance by setting up
an appointment with our funeral director.
You can meet at our facility, at your home,
or at another location to accommodate others
who may wish to join you.
Your plans can be very simple,
with just a few basic ideas of what you
would like for the service, it can be very
detailed - specifying the music, the readings,
or other special wishes. In either case,
the funeral director will write down all
the information you have given and keep
it on file. If your wishes change, you can
update your file as needed.
There are several ways to
pay for a memorial or funeral service ahead
of time.
One way is to assign an existing
insurance policy as payment for the memorial
or funeral service. If this is a good option
for you, you can work with your insurance
company and our funeral director to make
the necessary changes to your policy.
Another method is to set
aside money in a trust fund that will be
used exclusively to pay for the memorial
or funeral service.
The best option may be to
buy an insurance product specifically dedicated
to pre-paying the memorial or funeral service.
Our Pre-Planning services offer this type
of insurance.
If you would like more information,
or help deciding which option of paying
ahead for the memorial or funeral service
would be best for you, we can sit down with
you and discuss the choices. Call with any
questions you may have.
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